|
Throughout history,
great leaders and teachers have brought new ideas to the world,
improving the quality of life and the overall consciousness of
humanity in profound ways. For this reason, leaders and teachers are
necessary for the forward movement of our world in all areas of life.
Yet throughout this time, a small subgroup of the leaders, despite
their profound knowledge and insight, has brought an equal measure of
suffering and spiritual stagnation as a side effect to those they
teach, often veiled by the illusion of spiritual or intellectual
progress. The truly brilliant ones have veiled their other agendas
(which are often unconscious to them, never mind to their students) by
'dressing them up in white'. They present a body of spiritual 'truths'
which ultimately utilize God to intimidate or control, or in the least
proclaim their particular brand of spirituality as the highest or
somehow most endeared by the Divine One. This is called religious triumphalism, a phenomena that has brought more strife and world
conflict than any other ideology or motivation. The theme of
specialness prevails in many variations within this world view, and
those who teach from this place tend to have a few characteristic
traits. These traits both reveal their true nature to a trained eye,
and at the same time fuel the magnetic quality that attracts innocent
and unwitting followers into the fold.
Yet thanks to the efforts of many who have first-hand experience with
such leaders, the traits of such cults of the personality are fairly
definable. These qualities can be summed up into one simple
psychodynamic pattern: the wound of narcissism.
The narcissistic wound has its origins in childhood events and
parenting which set the child up to need an unnatural degree of
external attention, accolade, encouragement and respect from those
around him. His self-doubt is so profound that no amount of external
attention is enough. Even the smallest amount of criticism must be
exterminated in order for him to feel safe. Because there is no
internalized sense of self-worth and value in the world, he must
continuously seek out others to validate him. The result is fertile
ground for leaders and teachers who require endless amounts of
adoration and respect, who cannot tolerate dispute or difference of
opinion, and who cannot bear the existence of someone who may not
agree with them. In this scenario, all disagreeing individuals must
either be converted or banished from their psychological world.
Feedback is seen as offensive and the teachings of the leader must be
accepted without question.
This leadership pattern tends to thrive in certain environments,
including small businesses, successful brokerage firms, and
individualized or innovative spiritual paths and hierarchical
organizations set up around the will or funding of one individual.
Certainly not all organizations in this category become an
abuse-of-power situation, but these are the places that are most
vulnerable due to their very nature. Unfortunately, this does include
spiritual communities, especially those with a primary “spiritual
leader” or teacher. These communities become a rich opportunity for
individuals who have not done their shadow work, especially around
their needs for adoration or power. The use of the Divine Authority
then makes the pattern almost impenetrable, and it easily becomes the
resource to resist any form of self-inquiry around the matter, while
increasingly attracting those whose wounds create a yearning to adore,
or to be led so that they do not need to make their own spiritual
decisions, which might be wrong. The most vulnerable type of person in
this scenario is a perfectionist, one who is terrified of being wrong,
especially in front of God. Having someone who can tell them the "right way" to be spiritual eliminates both the doubt and the
responsibility. This lock and key fit are a set up for the most
egregious distortions of abuse of power within spiritual traditions.
In these settings, the leader can put himself above the law through
Divine Ordinance and engage in all version of abuse of power, from
inappropriate sexual conduct to misuse of finances and even illegal
activity with money, sex, power, and relationships to other so-called
authority figures such as the government and local civic law. When
these transgressions begin, the leader has usually convinced him or
herself that they are beyond the law and that the Divine One has given
them permission to do so. This form of delusion sadly leads to broken
hearts, marriages, families and in the long run has the tendency to
turn a true seeker of the Divine away from all spiritual tradition of
any sort.
Because this wound is subtle and unconscious, it is rarely in the
awareness of the leader and even more unlikely to be acknowledged. In
fact, if the leader were truly aware of the dynamic, it is not likely
they would continue. But it is the very lack of awareness in an
individual who presents him or herself as the most enlightened one in
the community, which causes most of the difficulties. People in this
category have tragically convinced themselves that they are working
for the higher good, all as a result of the narcissistic wound of
childhood. The solution therefore lies in the choices of the student.
For those who wish to avoid this pitfall or take themselves out of a
situation, the personal effort must be Herculean. If they are involved
already, they must face the displeasure, arguing, pleading and
justification of their peers. They are often labeled as "fallen", or
"off the path" or with their lower self in some manner. They are often
ostracized if they do leave and most contact is condescending at best.
For spiritual paths that teach equality and peace, this paradoxical
contradiction can be baffling.
For one who wishes to avoid such a circumstance, the qualities we are
speaking about are fairly self-evident. If more than a few of these
line up, you may want to consider an alternative direction. Or you
might want to question the leaders and listen to their response. If
they use Divine Authority or squelch any verbal dialogue or
disagreement as disrespectful or not allowed, you have an answer. Seek
formats and teachers and studies that encourage disagreement and
questioning and open dialogue about ANYTHING. Seek leaders and
teachers who own their mistakes and who are known to have done their
own work on the disowned power aspects. If a teacher says he has no
disowned energies or that he has already finished that work or claims
complete and total perfection, you may want to think again. This world
is a world of duality by nature and intention. In order to live on
this earth, one requires both a personality and a body, both of which
exist in universes of duality (the physical and emotional worlds).
There is no getting around it. If you have a body, you have duality.
It is more the nature of the relationship with the duality that is
important. Though many may disagree with this paradigm, I believe that
it is not likely that a Perfect Master exists on this earth (in other
worlds, maybe, but in the physical world, not likely). Most
self-proclaimed Perfect Masters that I know of have used that status
to put themselves above the law of humanity and engage in unethical
sexual and financial activities.
A more healthy option is to engage in an unemotional evaluation of the
qualities of the leader/teacher and see what you see. Understandably,
this is truly an uncomfortable topic, especially for those with good
intentions and beautiful hearts and true yearning for an experience of
the Divine. Yet, in all traditions, there exists a quality of God, a
name of God, an aspect of God which embodies strength and might,
sometimes in the form of the destroyer or in the least in the form of
a boundary or a no. Often these stronger qualities are disowned in
spiritual communities and seen as "unspiritual" by many. Anger, even
around betrayal or abuse, is seen as something that must be discharged
or overcome. Yet even God is portrayed as having these stronger
qualities in every ancient tradition that exists on the earth. The Kabbalists call it Gevurah or Din, the Sufis call it the Fire of God,
the Hindus call it Kali. In every tradition there lies a stronger,
less socially acceptable quality that is also considered Divine but
which is rarely utilized or discussed within the body of work. It is
this very quality that is disowned, judged or mishandled when one
comes across a leader, a spiritual teacher, or a cult of the
personality that is founded on the narcissistic wound. In such an
environment all forms of anger, boundary, or no are seen as
"unspiritual".
In addition, within the scope of one who has such a narcissistic
wound, it is possible to experience tremendous transformation, healing
or personal growth. But this can only be maintained while in the
presence of the leader or community. Without this cord of connection,
an individual is unable to have the same experience on their own.
Rather than being brought closer to themselves, being encouraged to be
more of who they really are, they are brought closer to the leader and
the leader's ideas and abilities. In this environment, individual
autonomy or beliefs which contradict the leader are slowly snuffed
out. And when not in the leader's presence there is a sense of loss
and yearning to be with them. This is because they cannot do for
themselves what the leader can do for them. And the barter often is
completed when the leader asks for money, favors, or sexual
involvement in trade. How could this possibly lead to spiritual
freedom and Divine connection without an intermediator?
All of this to say, there is an alternative. Living a spiritual,
ethical life does not have to hinge on involvement with a mediator,
though there are many great and ethical teachers in the world who do
not have this narcissistic wound. But greater effort and personal
responsibility is required. One must find a way to trust the Voice of
Truth inside rather than the Voice of Truth of an other, a perceived
authority figure who presents him or herself as "the knower". The path
less traveled is ultimately the one which engages in spiritual study,
prayer and right action in the world, while maintaining spiritual
autonomy no matter what, never giving away the one's soul or money or
body in return for spiritual progress. And ultimate trusting that you
DO know what is right for you, even if a thousand people tell you
otherwise. The Voice of Truth in the heart will always lead you home.
Trust it, learn from it, and find teachers who bring you closer to
yourself, closer to your own inner voice, rather than closer to them.
And may you find your way in this amazing journey home.
Next Teaching
|
